…. horse sex?? c’mon people.

… oh behave! Pilot dumps passenger in desert island…

daytime tv stinks

i am tired and want to nap, but find myself deeply disturbed by how much daytime tv stinks. and therefore i am compelled to write about it. however, i’m feeling really lazy and don’t feel like putting anything in caps.

first of all, soaps – what is that crap? i can’t even devote more thought to finding words to put around my thoughts on daytime tv, but so help me… if i ever start watchiing this stuff, take it away.

daytime tv stinks except…

hgtv. i’m addicted. i learn so much and it helps me figure out my personal sense of style. sort of.

what’s the deal with gas???

in wisconsin, i saw one gas station at $2.189 and just across the street it was $2.449. You’d think the guy across the street would say “wow, $2.449 really isn’t competitive today.” but now, he did not do that. even worse – there were people buying their gas there. can someone tell me if the 10% ethanol had something to do with it?

also, another thought occurred to me – why don’t they just say $2.45 and $2.19?? we all know that $2.449 is basically $2.45, so just pocket the $.001 and call it a day.

… that’s it for now…

Merry Christmas!

Well, it’s Christmas Eve and Frank and I are watching The Chritmas Story Marathon before heading back to church for the second Christmas service. Tonight Frank is narrating the story of Christ’s birth along with 4 other people at church. What’s hilarious about this is that Frank thought he was just reading, but it turned out that he is singing as well. With a microphone. And the mic is on. And I find him to be all the more attractive for it. Ow ow. Work it, baby.

Just a few lines that I love from the Christmas Story:

“Only one thing could pry me away from the soft glow of electric sex in the window (approx quote).”

“My father wove a tapestry of obscenities that to this day still hangs over Lake Michigan.”

“You look like a pink nightmare – are you happy in that?”

so here is the house with windows and a roof… hoorah!!

It is really only a mere flash in the proverbial pan, but I figure turning 25 is significant. And when I say significant, I mean “gosh, I may have to give up plucking the grays and just dye it all.” Oh loofah.

So let’s review my life.

Day 1: That was one heck of a day. It went something like this: Ow ow ow ow ow ow. ::Silence:: Blinding light. Blurry faces. Someone spanked my booty. Wah wah wah.

Ha. Day one sounds like day 8,337. ::ahem::

Day 59: Things are coming into focus. I’m cuter than I once thought. I like food.

Day 402: Working on balance. Athletic prowess seems to evade me. I like food. A lot. Now, if only I had teeth…

Day 967: They brought a little chubby Irish man home. How quaint.

Day 968: Aha! moment-little chubby Irish man is actually my little sister. Gotcha. Give me back the Guiness.

Day 2374: Parental units continued to multiply. “Just add water.” Yeah. Right. New baby has hose attachment. Brilliant!

Day 2744: Violent encounter with pavement resulted in the extrication of a few teeth.

Day 2744 – later in the day: Mom was kicked out of dentist office for being “crazy.”

Day 3892: Life changing video explains how Day 1 started. Highly disturbing. Still sorting it out on day 9130 – manuevering seems particularly complicated.

Day 4254: Mom’s midlife crisis results in pregnancy and puppy. Dad gets a hot sports car. Dad 1, Mom 0.

Day 4354: Mom has baby. Puppy is dumbest dog ever. Dad 0, Mom 0, Puppy 1.

Day 5840: Eligable for driver’s license. Hello world.

Day 5940ish: Became a Christian. Sweet.

Day 6130: Started college. Yeah, that’s right. Big city, here I come.

Day 6230: Met husband. It was totally love at first sight. Which is why we didn’t date until day 7915. I have that effect.

Day 7915ish: Graduated from college. Let Frank date me. Lucky dawg. (sucker)

Day 8336: Got married.

Day 8337: See Day 1.

Day 9129: See Day 1.

Thank you.

So I was in the bathroom (ahem) thinking about how fantastic my husband is and how wonderful our marriage is and then I started thinking, “wow, I can’t believe 4 years has gone by.” And then I caught myself. Where did year 3 go? I started trying to remember what our 3rd Christmas was like and what we did for that 3rd Easter… and then I realized we had only been married for 2 years and that we were coming up on our 4th anniversary of dating. Phew.

Glad that is resolved.

see something wrong with the fact that we are going to experience 50-100% increases in heating costs and BP experiences a 34% increase in quarterly profits?

BP PLC, one of the world’s largest oil companies, reported a 34 percent rise in quarterly profit Tuesday as record energy prices more than outweighed hurricane damage to its rigs and refineries.

BP said net profit for the three months ended Sept. 30 rose to $6.53 billion, up from $4.87 billion in the third quarter of 2004. Revenue jumped to $97.73 billion from $66.73 billion.

“The recent hurricanes in the U.S. have impacted our results. However, underlying performance is strong, amplified by high but volatile prices of oil, gas and products,” said Chief Executive Lord Browne. (Source: Jane Wardell, Associated Press)

Hm.