Well, let’s go back a little further – about eight years ago I was breaking up with my then longest boyfriend ever.
It was definitely for the better.
A few days later, this tall, lanky, cute friend of mine, who was very concerned about my well-being after the break up took me out to dinner. It was probably one of the best dinners I’d had in a long time. He was so much fun to talk to! We laughed the entire way home from the dinner and then we sat around for a few hours talking. When he left, he asked me for a good-bye kiss.
“But I just broke up with my boyfriend…”
EMILY!!! What were you thinking??
And I didn’t think he was really serious.
I called my friend Julie D (who later caught the bouquet at our wedding, coincidentally) and told her “I think I like my friend Frank!”
A month later I went down to Eastern Illinois University and then University of Illinois to meet up with friends… and Frank.
While at U of I, I told my friends that I had a crush on Frank. I didn’t want there to be any ambiguity about the situation.
I wore a skirt (I knew, even then, that Frank had a soft spot for skirts)…
We went to a party and came back to my friend Kate’s house.
Instead of my friends leaving Frank and I alone to talk, they all sat on the couch with us.
After five long, awkward minutes of virtual silence with everyone staring at eachother, Frank said, “Well… uh, I gotta get going….”
I walked Frank to the door. He said, “Well, kiddo, this might be the last time I see you until like, Thanksgiving…”
My heart sunk.
“Oh. C’mon, I’m sure I’ll see you before then.”
“Well, how about a good-bye kiss?”
“Frank! I don’t think so.” I smiled. He smiled.
And he left.
Without a good-bye kiss.
EMILY!!! Tactical error!
So, and I can’t believe I’m saying this, I didn’t realize that Frank liked me, even though I totally had a crush on him. I guess the use of the word “kiddo” kind of threw me off. It’s sort of a distancing, kid-sister kind of word to use. Plus, we’d been friends for four years – I couldn’t imagine that he was interested in me.
After that weekend, I called Frank one night “just to talk.” For an hour. The entire time, I was trying to get the nerve up to tell Frank that I liked him. You know, liked him, liked him.
I couldn’t do it.
I hung up the phone feeling like an idiot.
So I did what any mature adult would do: I went online. (hey, I was only a senior in college – what did I know)
Tallgrl98: Hi Frank
Frank523: Hi Emily
Tallgrl98: So, I wanted to tell you something on the phone, but I didn’t get the nerve up to tell you on the phone. Well, anyway, I like you.
(after I hit send, I wanted to hide forever)
Frank523: Well, I like you too, in a non-platonic kind of way.
Here is where I remind you that I was a BUSINESS major. I couldn’t remember if platonic was good or bad. Is non-platonic good or bad?
Instead of going on Dictionary.com and finding out that Frank meant that he liked me as more than friends, I assumed that he was telling me that he only liked me as a friend.
Thinking that Frank made himself perfectly clear in not liking me, I moved on.
I dated a few other guys.
But I still REALLY liked Frank.
And one night, again on the instant messager, I was talking to Frank about this new guy I was dating and he told me that his heart was broken.
This confused me. I asked him why.
He explained that he liked me. As in, he liked me, liked me.
My heart dropped.
I liked the guy I was seeing, but I liked Frank a whole lot more.
Night and day really.
You know, I like orange juice, but I realllly like ice cream.
Two totally different kinds of like.
But who knew what was going to happen with Frank. He wasn’t sure where he was going after graduation.
My heart was so torn.
Over Memorial Day, I went down to visit a friend in Asheville, NC. While I was there, we watched a movie and I fell sound asleep on the couch.
While I was sleeping, I dreamt about Frank. I won’t bore you with the details (and I could totally tell you exactly the dream I had – it’s still vivid), but I woke up with the distinct feeling that I HAD to break up with the guy I was seeing and I HAD to figure out a way to make it work with Frank.
So, as any mature college senior would do, I logged on to instant messager from my friend’s house.
While I was breaking it off with one guy in a conversation in one window, I was making plans to go on a date with Frank in another window.
And my soul felt at peace.
And Frank finally got his good-bye kiss. And I realized that Frank only says “kiddo” to people he really, really cares about.
About 10 months after our first kiss, Frank proposed on March 21st, 2003.
But one week before he proposed (seven years ago today), I graduated from my PIT class at my first ad agency (PIT= People in Training). After 10 weeks of the class on top of my regular work load, I was looking forward to having some semblance of my life back.
Frank suggested that we go on a nice date to celebrate the end of training. Little did I know what he was planning.
What’s funny is that the week before he proposed, I was starting to wonder where the relationship was going.
We were having some pretty deep conversations about our relationship, and in an effort to not tell me his plan to propose, Frank was being a little bit aloof about our future plans. And I read that as him not wanting to get married.
The good news is that I was wrong.
Six months after Frank proposed, we were married.
I think it worked out perfectly.